You’re best girlfriend has just gotten engaged, duly noted by the shiny piece of hardware she is now sporting on her left ring finger, and waving excitedly in your face. She now utters those words you knew had to be coming… “Will you be my bridesmaid?”. You of course respond with an immediate “yes” but what exactly does this mean?
The tradition of the bridesmaid was started to ward off evil spirits, in the time of the Roman Empire. Bridesmaids were dressed similar to the bride (and likewise the groomsmen akin to the groom) as to keep evil spirits from being able to easily identify the happy couple. Times have changed though and many brides choose to have their back-up dressed much differently. The primary role of today’s bridesmaid is to be that shoulder to lean on during the planning process, and be a stress detourant.
Things you should expect once you have taken on this role:
1. D.I.Y. guru- this may mean giving up Friday nights to stuff envelopes or a Saturday at the beach to hand make felt flowers for all the wedding flowers. Put in your glue-gun time and do it with a smile, remember you may someday need her help at your own wedding.
2. Personal Shopper- you may be loading up your car on your already too short lunch break with a 100 mason jars, which you happily had to drive across town to pick up. It also means scouting out bridesmaid dresses (use this to your advantage, email the bride that great J. Crew dress you found before she finds a more impractical dress) and picking up any other wedding necessities the bride may need.
3. Party Planner- get things rolling, there is after all the shower and the bachelorette party to plan, team up with the maid of honor and get the process rolling, don’t leave details until the last minute.
Remember to do everything with a smile, yes you can voice your opinion (when it is asked for), and know the bride asked you because you are important to her.
Things one should not do as a bridesmaid: being a bossy bridesmaid (this is NOT your wedding and it is not your way or the highway), a Debbie downer (if you do not want to be part of the wedding politely decline when asked, don’t sulk your way through), the jealous bridesmaid (your day will come, but this is not it), you are there (I repeat) to make the brides life easier NOT add to the stress.
“ Good manners are made up of petty sacrifices.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson